Tuesday, March 20, 2007

The witch at the breaking point at the turning point

Being at the turning point is always hard for everybody as that the point where we gotta make the decision which may not be made for twice. And who knows and can be sure that the decision you are going to make is gonna work out completely?

Yeah, not easy at all. But isn't it about life? If you are living a life without any hard time or problem or headache ( ofcourse not everyday, thanks God!!!), then you are not living a life! All you are doing is just existing! No more, no less!

Yeah, that my positive look at things whenever I have any problem on my way. Looking at a problem from a positive or humourous angle can be the solution for that problem.

But still, sometimes, you will be at the point that you cant tell what would be the best for you and part of you saying "Go for it!" while the other part ( either smaller or bigger) of you keeps holding you back as a body guard ( this time is a mental guard) , saying "It's not safe, stop it right here at this turning point"

And you! Dont know what to do, even dont know what to think. You got messed up with the feelings and thinkings, part of you wants to go for the feelings and the other part wants to protect you from the shit. Being torn in the middle, you dont know both are right and your tragedy is you dont know what to follow: to go with the feelings or to stay and protect the heart which has been hurt too much and you dont know if that little heart can go through even one more wind, not mention any slightest storm. Or would it be as torn as the banana leave after the shower? ( who can understand this Vietnamese idiom, raise your hands!)

Who would you talk to to share these thinkings and feelings in your mind which have been haunting you for sooo long. You know for yourself that holding these feelings is not healthy at all. Not healthy for your heart (mentally and physically), not healthy for your beloved ones and not healthy for the relationship. You know that the trust has been hurt and you soo want to get it back, for yourself first!, not for anyone else or anything else. And though knowing that being controlling or getting mad with others is unfair for both sides and it's really stupid to do that, you still cant stop yourself from being a catty bitch!


So what's on your mind? What is taking control over your action and thinkings? What made you turn to be a witch rasing the claws? Can " trying to protect myself" be a good enough excuse?What is it? What are you afraid of? What is your scare? What is your fear? Let it out and let it go! That's the only thing you can do to work this out and you also know that only you can do that: let things go!

This is the decision that will be made by yourself and for yourself (only yourself, no one can do it or convince you on how to make it or on what way to go) and you know that you are now at turning point but also the breaking point. You know that you have to make that decision as soon as you can and you also know that you dont have much time left.

It's really a hard time.

But again, that's life! Ups and downs make the life more worthy to live and to enjoy even the sweet or the bitter, the laughters or the tears. It's still the life and you know that you will still have to live it and go on with it, no matter what the decision you are gonna make is.

So, are you ready for the new ups and downs in the new page of your life?

Chin up and make your mind! Time's up!